Roleplaying Quotes
& Famous Last Words

You know, one thing you quickly realise about roleplaying is that it makes you say the dumbest things! We always keep a Book of Quotes for our games, just to remember all of those times we have been reduced to tears laughing at something stupid that a character came out with. Feel free to send us in your funniest moments. Enjoy...

Sage DM to newbie DM:		Don't give the players a plot, that way they can't f*%k it up!

The most famous line:		Don't roll a 1...

Player:	What's the local pub called?
DM:	The Boar's Arse
Player: 	I go up the back of The Boar's Arse

Player:	I reckon we go into the tavern and wait for something to happen...

Player:	I go shopping (Only female player in the group)

Player:	Oh, God, I got the Paladin drunk..

Player:	How many hours ride are we from the fort?
DM:	About 2 days...

Player:	I assume the position on Bess
	(Bess was a horse. I don't know if this makes it better or worse!)

DM:	Anything east of Bess is behind you.

Player:	Have I enough time to cackle with glee?

DM:	But there's nothing left to kill?!

DM:	It's just a scratch, but it's a nasty scratch

Players:	Peg it!
DM:	Full out peg carries you a long way!

Player:	Stick the riding crop up its arse!

DM:	What weapon!? A swiss-army bow? A flick-scythe?

Player:	Anything important he forgot to leave out?

DM:	It's a nice bit of wood.

Player:	I smack my shoe up.

Player:	No! No! He has it on, 'cos I don't.

Wild Mage:	Oh Bugger!.....Pop!  <The wild mage vanishes in a power surge!>

Thief:	<Cackle> We'll go down and murder everyone!

Ranger:	I drink the Ogre.

DM:	A grenade lands at your feet, what do you do?
Player:	Right! Who threw that?
DM:	BOOOOOOMMMM!!!!!

Werewolf:		I'll hold him down.
Dm:			He's still struggling.
Werewolf:		Scratch him a little bit.
DM:			Oops...